The Bottom 10

First a brief question: did anyone else notice during the cryfest that was Angie Miller's departure that they didn't do the coin toss to see who would sing first at the finale? Didn't they always used to do that on the Top 3 results shows? Or am I dreaming...

A couple of weeks ago I posted a list of my favorite Idol contestants. This time we travel to the depths of Idol hell and relive my least favorite Idol contestants ever since I started watching the show religiously in Season 5. Believe it or not, I would still watch the show if this group was the Top 10, only to be able to make fun of them all over again, or in the case of 2 dudes on this list, for the very first time. Let's start then with everybody's favorite Idol diva:

Katherine McPhee, Season 5

Katherine was the best singer that season, which is a complement to her since that same season featured perhaps the strongest Top 12 in the history of the show if the Nielsen ratings and the number of contestant record deals are any indication. The problem was that Katherine was so arrogant about it. She seemed to act as if it was her birthright to win. It was telling that during the season finale she didn’t participate in the chicks’ group number but Taylor Hicks participated in the dudes’ group number. The other dudes all talked about how much they liked to pal around with Taylor. The other chicks didn’t say anything about Katherine.

Michael Johns, Season 7

Michael is probably my all-time least favorite finalist. Katherine McPhee’s arrogance paled in comparison to Michael’s even though he wasn’t nearly as good a singer as she was. This dude used to brag about how he was an Olympic caliber swimmer and was supposedly considered to take over as lead singer of INXS after Michael Hutchence died. I thought it was so fitting that he was eliminated on the Idol Gives Back show after he was led to believe by Ryan that there would be no elimination that night as was the case the season before. It was also fitting that he was eliminated after he claimed that Aerosmith’s “Dream On” was inspirational.

David Archuleta, Season 7

David is on this list not because of anything he did but because of everything everybody around him did. The Idol producers kept pushing this kid as the greatest singer in the history of the show, which he wasn’t. The Idol judges kept praising this kid even when he once forgot the lyrics to a Beatles song. It took mentor Andrew Lloyd Webber to point out to David that his voice was thin and that he always sang with his eyes closed. Then of course there was his stage dad father who directed his every move and chose every one of his songs until the producers finally banned him from the studio. I also believe that it was David’s failure to win Season 7 that inspired the tweener chicks to start power texting their votes to insure that the next cute dude won, which influenced the results for the next 4 seasons.

Nick Mitchell (aka Norman Gentle), Season 8

I know his entire act was just that, and if he had only appeared on the audition shows I would have just laughed it off and awaited his appearance in the finale with the other freaks. However, this dude and his act made it all the way to the semi-finals and by then it had gotten real old real fast. Nick even promised to leave behind the Norman Gentle thing when he made the semis, only to go full bore with the act during his performance. I get annoyed by a contestant who doesn’t take the show seriously, that is supposed to be my job.

Tatiana Del Toro, Season 8

At the other end of the serious scale from Nick that season, there was Tatiana. She was the star of the Hollywood Week and semi-final shows that season, which is saying something considering Nick Mitchell was on the same shows. The reason she was the star was because the producers wanted to show more drama during the auditions rather than more talented contestants, and Tatiana was the perfect muse for the producers to work with. A lot was made over the fact that she had a hard time staying in a group during Group Night, then again she was prominently featured during the semi-final show when she sang “Saving All My Love For You” for the umpteenth million time. The nervous breakdown that Tatiana had when she learned that she was voted off was so dramatic that Ryan had to call in security to get her off the stage. Nobody before or since had gone psycho during the live shows since they usually get drummed out during the auditions. To her credit though Tatiana made it through. The fact that it was when Simon was still a judge makes her accomplishment even more impressive.

Scott McIntyre, Season 8

Lazaro Argos was not the first Idol contestant with “special powers” as Nicki liked to refer to his speech impediment. Scott was Idol’s first and thus far only blind contestant, which is what got him well into the finals even though he couldn’t sing all that well. Paula praised him every week for overcoming adversity rather than for any of his singing, much like Mariah did with Lazaro this season. The fact is though if the dude hadn’t been blind he would have never made it to the live shows. That fact didn’t bother me, it was the fact that he still acted as if he was entitled to be there even though his vocal abilities weren’t all that good. Again, kind of like Lazaro.

Danny Gokey, Season 8

Scott McIntyre wasn’t the only one in Season 8 with a sob story that was shoved down our throats. There was also Danny Gokey and the death of his wife just before the auditions. Every week we were reminded by somebody about his wife’s death, either by Danny, Ryan, one or more of the judges, the mentors, the person who produced the intro videos, and so on. I think Ricky Minor and the band may have done it one week. Danny was a decent singer so unlike Scott I think he earned his spot on the live shows, but it just got to be too much.

Yes, I was quite annoyed during Season 8, and not just because Paula was leaving the show after that season. That's what happens when you decide to feature the contestants' personalities rather than on the wacky judges and the celebrity tor-mentors, as Idol did that season. Can't blame Nigel though, he was working on the goofy dance show down the hall that year.

Casey James, Season 9

Casey is in the running with Michael Johns for the title of the biggest poser in the history of the show. This dude had a major ego that was unbearable to watch. He got his ticket to Hollywood because he took his shirt off, and next thing you know he’s parading around the stage as if he was the next Dave Matthews. It took several weeks for the judges to start pointing out to Casey how dull and boring his performances were, and even then it took a few more weeks before the tweener chick voters finally gave up on him and starting voting for Lee DeWyze. I still remember when during the semi-final shows that he promised to reveal his super-secret pre-show routine if he made the Top 10, then never mentioning it again.

James Durbin, Season 10

I think it’s fair to say that James wasn’t as much of a poser as either Michael Johns and Casey James, but he’s in the same conversation. I was on sabbatical from this blog that season so I didn’t get a chance to slam him as much as I did the other two. Perhaps he can take it as a compliment that I wasn’t annoyed with him enough to start writing again. Then again, there was no one in Season 10 that I felt that passionate about, either positively or negatively. The whole season was dull, dull, dull. So perhaps James can take it as a compliment that he is the only contestant from that season on either the good or bad list.

Colton Dixon, Season 11

Oh yes, the oh so saintly Colton with his Flock of Seagulls haircut who kept pretending to be humble, kept pretending to be thankful for the opportunity to be on the show, and kept claiming that his sister was the better singer even though she didn’t even make it past Hollywood Week. Why am I not surprised that he’s now supposedly a big star in the Christian music world? Fortunately he didn’t last long enough on the show for me to be really upset with him.

Angie Miller, Season 12

At the time I didn’t understand why Angie chose to sing a Colton Dixon song early in the live shows, but by the time she sang it again when she got eliminated it all made sense. Our little Disney Princess ranks in the top 5 of the all time posers on the show and is the only chick in that group. I will say in her defense that she sang much better than the dude posers, so it's harder for me to feel animosity towards Angie like I do to Michael Johns and Casey James. Like so many on this list I was hoping that she didn’t win the competition, but unlike most on this list it wouldn’t have kept me up at night if she had.

Lazaro Argos, Season 12

This dude would have kept me up at night if he won and I suspect that I wouldn't be the only one. What bothered me about Lazaro wasn’t the fact that the only reasons he made it as far as he did was because he looked handsome and had a serious speech impediment. What bothered me about him was that he wasn’t willing to show any respect to anybody, blamed everybody else for his bad performances, and just didn't seem to care how well he sang after he realized he was getting by on just his looks and his sob story. One week he would claim he forgot the lyrics because he wasn’t given enough time to learn them, the next he would claim that he sang bad because the band was playing in the wrong key, and then there was those awful group numbers that he kept flubbing the lyrics on and causing the other dudes to be sent home. Even when he was being introduced into the top 10 he was yelling at the band to get the key right before he sang his song. At that point why would anyone care what key the song was in? He should have just been thankful that he made it as far as he did. It sure as hell beats scooping ice cream for a living.