Sitting In For Paula While She Is On Assignment

So in wake of Rehab Girl's decision to abandon the best job of her career, the producers of American Idol have been auditioniing "guest judges" during the auditions. So far the list of fourth panelists includes:

Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham, getting in her last Hollywood licks before hubby David ships her off to Milan;
Shania Twain, trying to prove that she can actually have a career in music after leaving her ex-husband/producer/Svengali Mutt Lange;
Katy Perry, trying to prove that she is not a novelty act. Odd way to do it though;
Mary J. Blige, who doesn't need this drama;
Joe Jonas, who doesn't need the money;
Kelly Clarkson, who keeps coming back to Idol even after telling 19 Entertainment to kiss her ass a few years ago.

Rumored to be either under consideration or being hotly pursued by the Idol producers for a guest judge stint include Queen Latifah, Jennifer Lopez, and...

Paula Abdul

Yes, there are actually rumors that Rehab Girl is talking to Fox about returning to the chair next to Captain Jack after all, especially after she was left off of the guest list of the upcoming Dancing With The Stars. Her agent of course denies this because that is what agents do to earn their big bucks, but neither Paula nor her agent have publically ruled it out. Her old buddy Nigel Lythgoe still wants Paula to appear on that stupid dance show across the hall, So You Think You Can Dance, but sources say that Rehab Girl is not interested in sitting next to Lythgoe and that screaming chick anytime soon.

While I for one think I can make some good hay with Posh Spice, J-Lo, or most of the other celebrity impersonators/judges, none of them would be better than my dear friend Paula, especially now that she has made such a dramatic scene by leaving. Can you imagine what off-the-wall analogies Simon Cowell will be able to dream up if Paula comes back? It would make things a lot more interesting, and make it easier to sit through the off-key auditions and the self-indulgent contestants.

I just noticed something, Debbie Gibson is not on this list. Remember a few years ago when Gibson sat in for a few guest judge appearances and the rumors started to fly that she was going to replace Paula? But now that the producers are actually looking for someone to replace Paula Ms. Electric Youth is nowhere to be seen. Must have been that Playboy spread...

Rehab Girl Has Left The Building

The countdown to American Idol's final episode has officially begun.

From the Los Angeles Times:

Paula Abdul posts on Twitter she won't be back on 'American Idol'
08:47 PM PT, Aug 4 2009

Paula Abdul, who has been in tense negotiations with Fox for a new deal to stay with "American Idol," wrote on Twitter tonight that she is leaving the show.

Abdul wrote: "I’ll miss nurturing all the new talent, but most of all being a part of a show that I helped from day1 become an international phenomenon."

Abdul's contract expired after this past season, its eighth, ended in May. Auditions for next season begin Thursday in Denver. Last week, word leaked that Kara DioGuardi, who was added this year to the judging panel, would return, and Fox officially announced Monday that DioGuardi's option had been picked up, putting even more pressure on the Abdul question.

Tuesday, Fox and the two companies that produce "American Idol," FremantleMedia North America and 19 Entertainment, issued a joint statement: "Paula Abdul has been an important part of the 'American Idol' family over the last eight seasons and we are saddened that she has decided not to return to the show. While Paula will not be continuing with us, she's a tremendous talent and we wish her the best."

Host Ryan Seacrest recently signed a deal paying him $10 million and Abdul, according to people close to the show, wanted a similar paycheck. She was making between $2 million and $4 million a year and wanted a significant raise, these people said. (Those close to Abdul put the salary figure on the lower end of that spectrum.)

Abdul's manager did not respond to a call seeking comment earlier Tuesday when word started to spread that talks had soured.

-- Joe Flint

The Times also had this report:

Paula Abdul Won't Return to American Idol
Sarah Jersild

The blogosphere is agog with the news that veteran judge Paula Abdul will not be returning to " American Idol" next season. Abdul broke the news to her fans via her Twitter account. Here's the text of her message in full:

"With sadness in my heart, I've decided not to return to #IDOL. I'll miss nurturing all the new talent, but most of all ...being a part of a show that I helped from day1become an international phenomenon ... What I want to say most, is how much I appreciate the undying support and enormous love that you have showered upon me ... It truly has been breathtaking, especially over the past month ... I do without any doubt have the BEST fans in the entire world and I love you all."

This comes on the heels of the news, announced on August 3, that controversial new judge Kara DioGuardi would be returning to the series. DioGuardi's presence at the judging table has divided the Idol fandom.

And this was in USA Today:

Abdul won't return for Season 9 of 'Idol'
By Edna Gundersen, USA TODAY

Paula Abdul has tweeted ta-ta to American Idol, ending weeks of negotiations and speculation.

"With sadness in my heart, I've decided not to return to #IDOL," she wrote on Twitter late Tuesday. "I'll miss nurturing all the new talent, but most of all being a part of a show that I helped from day 1 become an international phenomenon."

In a statement, Fox and the show's producers said Abdul was "an important part of the American Idol family over the last eight seasons, and we are saddened that she has decided not to return to the show."

They said she was a "tremendous talent" and wished her the best.

Her move follows news that songwriter Kara DioGuardi, who just completed her first season as a judge on the top-rated Fox talent show, would return for the ninth season. After eight seasons with the series, Abdul had been in talks with Fox for a raise and expressed hope that she'd return. She told fans on Twitter last week, "I hope you can understand that I can only return to Idol if the deal is fair."

Fellow judges Simon Cowell and Randy Jackson already are under contract for the upcoming season.

Contributing: The Associated Press

Even the New York Times reported on this story, but rather than post the report, which pretty much echoed all the other reports, I'll instead post some of the comments left on their message board. Keep in mind that this is the New York Times:

"At least she has her sensational singing career to fall back on. Oh wait."
(now that is just mean)

"SAD day for American Idol. So much for the number one show. Do they think we’re all going to watch Simon and Kara fight with each other? Had enough of that last year. Simon without Paula will be the death of the show. They WERE the show. He will not be happy sitting in that chair IF he even shows up for work. I wouldn't blame you if you DON’T show up Simon. Simon HAS Paula’s heart but now the show has NO HEART."
(do you think Captain Jack is going to quit the show just because Rehab Girl isn't there anymore? I know of 10 million reasons why he'll still show up)

"Oh Paula, you’re only hurting yourself. Idol revived her career & its never wise to leave a hit show for potentially greener pastures (just ask David Caruso). Other than Dancing w/the stars, I’m not sure we’ll see much more of Paula."
(good point, now that Paula is available I could see Dancing With The Stars making a move to hire her. It would be lots of good publicity)

"$2 million not enough? don’t let the door hit you on the way out."
(when everyone else on the show including Trained Seal is getting paid more? I agree with Paula, $2 mil isn't enough. I betcha Ricky Minor is getting paid more than that)

"2 million dollars to say your presence is good your outfit is great and you shine on stage….come on people! Why can we not grab a gig like this American Idol I am your next judge.
Sincerily a true fan that doesn't miss an episode!"
(if just watching every episode is enough to qualify someone to be an Idol judge then I should be at the front of this line. I do have documented judging experience and proof that I have watched every show after all)

"Hummm … We will all tune in & witness the new season judging, minus a real heart. I predict a substantial drop in viewership."
(I imagine both Randy and Kara would be offended by this opinion, Simon not so much)

"Don’t they understand that Seacrest is NOT who their audience enjoys–its the contestants and the judges!!"
(Come on Dad, enough of this Ryan Seacrest is trying to take over the world conspiracy talk)

"I am sorry that Fox decides that paula was not worth the money, and I feel they will come to regret this decision, as for myself, I will no longer watch the show! Greedy fox, you should be ashamed."
(judging from how Fox forced Idol to air shorter episodes this past season compared to years past I suspect Fox gave up on this show before you did)

"I would like to suggest she redefine her definition of “Fair” two million bucks for six months work would seem more than fair to most people."
( I would like to suggest that you redefine your definition of "most people")

"You Go Girl! I only watched IDOL because of you and Simon, and Randy. Without you it will never be the same."
(notice the comma before Big Sexy's name, as if he were an afterthought. But I guess being an afterthought is better than not being mentioned at all, right Kara?)

Since I'm enjoying this so much here are some more comments from Popsugar.com, not exactly playing in the same league as the New York Times:

"Paula will be missed. Now we will be stuck with Kara as the only female voice on the panel. I can't stand Kara. I want Paula back! "You suck Fox!
(I bet no one who comments on the Times website will use the words "You suck Fox")

"Slowly, I have lost interest in what happens to AI. While this past season was quite talented, I get tired of the bickering and exaggerated time-slots (seriously, 60 minutes just to find out in the last 2 minutes who goes home). Oh well, I'll sort-of miss her, sort-of feel relief that I no longer have to hear her confusing ramblings. "
(I'll sort-of miss having to type her confusing ramblings)

"I used to be embarrassed for her craziness, but I came to realize she was the only one who tried to give any kind of useful feedback and had personality. I was pretty close to giving up on it next season--now I'm officially Anonymous, Out. "
(what show were you watching? And why are you embarrassed for Paula? She sure isn't)

"I will not watch AI without Paula. FOX has made a bad error in letting her go. Kara can't cut it."
(I cannot think of any witty rebuttal to this one)

"I am really sad to hear this. I am actually one of the few who likes Kara but I also loved Paula. I will miss the bickering between Paula and Simon"
(I also liked Kara and loved Paula, but probably for much different reasons than you)

"I like Paula ..... I can't stand Kara with her annoying and long comments. Ugh can't stand her "
(I bet if you were to go through last year's shows and time them you'll find that Paula's comments were longer and more annoying that Kara's. They were also more entertaining I might add)

"i am not a fan of the show, and she always seemed disturbed to me. i think she needs a rest and some treatment. "
(if you're not a fan of the show then why are you posting a comment about it on some obscure web site? Are you hiding something?)

"Paula is crazy as can be, the woman needs help! I thought she would have been fired a long time ago. She looks drugged every time i see a clip of her. "
(you must have been watching clips from Seasons 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, or 7. She was much more sober in Season 8. Perhaps that's what led Fox to let her go)

This is just sad. I suspected for over a year now that this was coming, but still.... I'll be able to finish the recaps earlier and go to bed sooner next season, but still....