Hurray for Hollywood

I had thought about taking it easy with the Hollywood Week recap. Judging from what usually happens on the episode I figured that there was no way I could keep track of who was singing what and when and with whom. However, the Idol producers decided to switch things up this year and completely revise the format for Hollywood Week. No group auditions and no groups locked in a room at the end. Instead we have instruments and lots of individual auditions, which makes it harder on the contestants but easier for me. So, off we go with the most intense Hollywood Week in Idol history, at least according to Ryan Seacrest.

So here’s the deal, this time there are three rounds of auditions. The first round features solo performances with the singers allowed to play their own instruments. Those that get a “yes” go past Round 2, collect $200, and move to Round 3. Those that get a “no” come back for Round 2, where the contestants take the stage in groups of 10 and sing a brief a capella number, no instruments, no piano, just the voice. Then the cuts are made. The survivors of Round 2 meet up with the yeses from Round 1 for one final round, this time with the American Idol band. The results are immediate yes or no, and we are left with 50 contestants for Randy, Paula, and Simon to bicker about at the end of the show.

First up is Brooke White, the innocent woman from the Philadelphia auditions that Simon wanted to deflower. She’s the first to perform while playing an instrument, in this case an organ (sorry, if it has to be plugged in it’s not a piano), and sings “Beautiful.” The judges look on adorningly until White misses a note, and then all we see are stone faces. Still, besides that one note she’s performs well and gets 3 yeses and a pass to Round 3.

Then we’re treated to a parade of no’s, including the annoying yet abstinent cheerleader Amy Flynn. We see 8 no’s in a row, all featuring Simon saying something creatively mean. Are Paula and Randy even in the building? The last no is Jake Mellema from Michigan, who plays the drums while singing “Hooked on a Feeling”. Though original, his performance was really pitchy. The song choice also left much to be desired. Even Paula, who usually likes sappy songs from the 70’s, was critical though in her own special way. “It was not my favorite,” she said. After a rant from Simon the drummer is sent away with 3 no’s.

David Hernandez, 24 from Jordin Sparks’ hometown of Glendale, Arizona, works out Steven Stills’ “Love the One Your With” without any instruments. He starts it off as a slow ballad and then takes it up tempo for the finish. His voice has a lot of character and he made the song his own. The judges agree and send him through.

Next is the Rock and Roll Nurse from the Atlanta auditions, Amanda Overmyer. Seems she got into a car accident just before the auditions and performed The Doors “Light My Fire” with 12 staples in her head and cracked ribs. Is there a better way to sing a Doors' song? I don't think so. She’s got a very distinctive voice with lots of passion; even though she slurs some of the words at least she sang them all. I can’t see her winning but she’s still pretty good and gets 3 yeses. The comparisons to Chris Daughtry are inevitable, indeed Paula did just that at the auditions, but she actually reminds me more of Taylor Hicks, another guy with a distinctive voice that nobody thought would win until he actually did. If she makes it to the Top 24 I’ll be rooting for her.

Even with all of the changes to the format there is still one constant to Hollywood Week, Simon warning the contestants not to forget the lyrics and then dismissing all the ones that do.

Ghaleb Emachah, the Latin lover from Venezuela with the Jewish sounding name, is back wooing the ladies again, especially fellow contestant and singing waitress Cardin McKinney. He sings Bryan Adams’ “I Do It for You” in monotone with an accent, which I didn’t think was possible. Paula’s still enthralled by his Latin charms though, until he botches the last note. Simon then invents a new description, calling it a “clear out” performance, comparing it to a waiter who sings so bad that it clears out the room. Maybe he really does write these things down beforehand. Emachah’s a no and that ends Day 1.

Day 2 begins with Josiah Leming, the kid from Tennessee who lives in his car. I wonder if he drove his home to Hollywood, but Ryan doesn’t say how he got there. He’s still got the British accent in his singing voice, and is now spotting a Beatles mop-top haircut to go with it. His performance is a bit over the top but he demonstrates a wide range. It was OK. The judges all love him though and give him a pass.

There are quick snippets of Danny Noriega, Ramiele Malabay, Carly Smithson, and Michael Johns, all four yeses. Though Smithson and Johns may be early favorites because of their professional experience, I’d watch out for Malabay. If she makes it to the Top 24 then every Filipino in America will be voting for her regardless of how well she does. Just ask Jasmine Trias. Malabay might even be a better singer than Trias too.

Tonight’s Medley of Semi-Losers (because at this stage of the competition they are all winners, just ask Paula) is Bryan Adams’ “I Do It for You”. In addition to Emachah, there were a whole host of contestants who sang this sappy 80’s song. The best of the lot was David Cook, the bartender from Tulsa who watched Chris Daughtry videos for pointers before auditioning. His green tongue was distracting and he shouted some parts but overall he did alright. Simon didn’t like it, though Cook and Ryan think it’s because of Cook’s hair. Randy and Paula were yeses though.

The final contestant of the opening round is Kyle Ensley, the geeky would-be politician from Oklahoma. He arrives at the hotel to find two girls in his room. He thinks that it’s a mix-up and meekly walks away, proving that he really doesn’t have what it takes to be a politician. He sings a spirited but sloppy rendition of “Love Grows (Where My Rosemary Goes)” by Edison Lighthouse (yes, this is a song that I know well, unlike that Rascal Flatts stuff). Paula lauds his spirit several times but cannot bring herself to say no, leading Simon to leave the stage in disgust. I guess Randy said no but it’s almost as if he’s not there.

Day 3 is Do or Die Day. 48 got passes to Round 3, leaving 116 to sing for their supper, or if you believe Ryan for their very lives. The first group of 10 includes Suzanne Toon and Perrin Cataldo, the single parents from Florida and Arizona respectively. Both get their 15 seconds and even though I thought Cataldo was pretty good both of them are among those that are cut.

Another one cut was the annoying cheerleader Amy Catherine Flynn, who tried “Love Will Bring You Back”, a song that she had never heard before but sang at the recommendation of her vocal coach Angel. Angel, it seems, was a Season 4 auditioner but apparently didn’t make the cut that year, yet still Flynn admires her for her expertise. Those that can’t do, teach, which may be in Flynn’s future now that she’s going home.

Another group features Cristy Lee Cook, the mixed martial artist who lives in a log cabin in Oregon; Jeffrey Lampkin, the jolly guy from South Carolina who made it through with his less ebullient sister (little sis was ousted in an earlier group); and Angela Martin from Chicago, who auditioned for Idol to feed her sick daughter and now was singing for her father who passed away just before Hollywood Week. I must admit that I feel sorry for Martin, no joke, especially since she was sent home while Cook and, surprisingly, Lampkin moved on to the next round. Martin tries to convince the audience, and perhaps herself, that “it’s all good.” For her sake I sure hope so.

Ryan plays up the drama some more as we move to Day 4, when the first round winners meet up with the second round survivors for one more go. Yet another format change, as this time the American Idol band is brought in, complete with the back-up singers that Melinda Doolittle shared a mike with during her final performance last season. First up is 16 year old David Archuleta from Utah, the Star Search winner that got Randy going with “Waiting for the World to Change” at the San Diego auditions. He picks a Bryan Adams’ song this time, thankfully not “I Do It for You” but rather “Heaven”. You can hear the nerves in his voice but he’s sounded better than he did at the auditions when he was still recovering from vocal paralysis. His voice is 16 going on 40. Randy doesn’t sing back-up this time but he’s still all over it and votes yes along with Paula and Simon.

I guess Kyle Ensley got an answer from Paula and Randy because he’s back again, this time singing “You Raise Me Up”. This performance was 10 times better than “Love Grows”, so much so that it led Simon to actually apologize on camera for walking off the stage in a huff. Ensley is through to the Top 50 and didn’t even have to campaign for it.

Not so fortunate, though, was Jeffrey Lampkin and Joey Catelano, the guy from the Philly auditions that lost 200 pounds before the auditions and was the first auditioner featured this season. He’s managed to keep the weight off since the audition but a migraine headache does him in this time and he’s out along with Lampkin.

Also suffering from medical problems is Sayesha Mercado, the 20 year old from Miami whose father had just gotten out of rehab when she auditioned. She’s still all smiles even though she can barely talk. She comes out in a really short skirt and belts out another Aretha number, “Chain of Fools” (remember she did what she called “Think Freedom” at her audition). Like her audition she shouted at times but other times was OK. She does well under the circumstances and gets three yeses from the judges.

Michael Johns is back to sing Queen’s “Bohemian Rhapsody”. Remember he’s the Aussie who ditched his band just as they were about to record their first album. He does have a really good voice, though at times he shouts it out like a big hair rock singer. Former boy band producer Simon loves it along with the other judges and he’s through.

Carly Smithson, the Irish lass who is the subject of all the Idol whiners because she once had a recording contract, comes back to sing Heart’s “Alone”. This to me was the best performance of the night. It’s the only one that I could imagine being on an album. She’s got a nice low range, kind of like Cher, but unlike Sonny Bono and Gregg Allman’s ex she’s got a good high range too. 3 easy yeses for her.

Asia’h Epperson, the 19 year old from Joplin, Missouri who has added an ‘h since her Atlanta audition but still has the ‘tude and the voice comes out and does pretty well herself. She was the one whose father died as she was traveling to Atlanta for the audition, and I wondered how she would do after some time had past since her dad’s death. She did pretty well from what I could tell, though I couldn’t catch it all because my DVR started acting funny at this point.

Brooke Helvie, Miss South Florida Fair, still has the look but not the voice, especially when she hits the falsetto part of “Unchained Melody” and shatters every glass window within a mile of the auditorium. Despite panning it as per his custom Simon still says yes, probably based on her look alone. Randy’s a no, leaving it up to Paula to decide. Well, you can probably guess what happened next. The pressure is on and Paula is cracking, and the pleading from the pageant queen is only making it worse. Finally, Paula says no, shattering both women to tears.

Josiah Leming, the last one to audition for Idol, is the last singer of Hollywood Week and he is an emotional wreck. It seems that he and the Idol Band cannot get on the same page, and even after working until 4 am Leming can’t seem to get them to perform the arrangement that is to his liking. He too has a vocal coach (how can a kid who lives in his car afford a vocal coach? Inquiring minds want to know) but that doesn’t seem to help. So he hits the stage after 2 hours of sleep and dismisses the band to sing “Stand by Me” without accompaniment. He’s giving it all he’s got but it’s not going well and the judges, even Paula, are not happy campers. Leming tries to argue that he was being brave by singing without the band and gets immediately shot down by Simon as being arrogant. For once I actually agree with the bloody bastard. Still, they all say yes. I wonder how he'll do from this point on because he'll have to deal with the band every single week.

The show ends as Hollywood Week usually does, with the three judges alone in the theater staring at Polaroids and bickering with each other as they decide on the Final 24. Since Polaroid recently announced that they were going to stop producing Polaroids I guess there’ll be yet another format change next year.

The Final Score: 7 digs at Paula, 6 at Simon, and only 2 at Randy, but that’s because he must have been out getting a hot dawg half the time. He definitely got the least amount of screen time. 3 Chris Daughtry references, 1 each of Taylor Hicks and Melinda Doolittle, and surprisingly no references, either by me or by the show, to Kelly Clarkson.

Your 3 Stars of the Night: I would have to go with Carly Smithson, who is quickly emerging as a possible favorite; the Rock and Roll Nurse Amanda Overmyer; and David Hernandez, who wasn’t even shown in the San Diego audition show, but then again I don’t recall Idol broadcasting Chris Daughtry’s audition either. Honorable mention to everyone who didn’t sing a Bryan Adams song.

Tomorrow is the Chair Show, when we find out who has made it to the Top 24. I rarely do recaps of results shows, except to review the accuracy of my Bottom 3 predictions, but I will still make sure to post the list of finalists and add my two cents in for this one. You’re on your own after that.